3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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