just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
