Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
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Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
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You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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