hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
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