I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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