He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
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