So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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