tell your sister to shave her snatch
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
