I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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