All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
