Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
