I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Randomize
