dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
