I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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