That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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