Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
