I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
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