I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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