Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
Randomize
