Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize