Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
farters have to be the big spoon...
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
