What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
