oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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