what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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