My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
