you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
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