you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
