I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize