just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Randomize
