You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
