dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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