I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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