Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.