I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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