Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
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