at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
