And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
