I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Randomize