i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.