if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Randomize
