I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
