Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
