you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize