There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Two words: blizzard sex
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize