the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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