Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
i think im in europe. pls send help
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
