Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
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