I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
