I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Found your dick twin last night
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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