he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
