its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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