So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Randomize
