is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
