well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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