billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
of course. lets lasso hookers.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
