Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
